Thursday, September 11, 2014

This time, it is the story of a beard ...

So it all started on Tuesday at WinCo.
I was minding my own business, doing my regular speed shopping (where I frantically tare up and down the store chucking things into my basket as my children scramble to catch up) when I spotted a very handsome man.
He was wearing a baseball hat, t-shirt, jeans that accentuated his ... umm ... shoes, and he had a beard.
After screeching to a halt, I started following this man around, staring at him and his beautiful beard, passing him conspicuously in every aisle, and even bonus! scored a few suspicious sideways glances as he noticed me stalking him.  
Then I lost him in the frozen foods and only saw his back as I shuffled out with my grocery-laden cart, Micah screaming about the lollipop he dropped on the ground.
It was magical.
Anyway, my point is that, clearly, I am awkward, and I am starting to feel desperately lonely.
Like, having had no contact with the opposite sex (outside of my one date) in the last 8 months.
And, yes, that one date did lead to some texting and a discussion about going out again, but the more I got to know him, the more I felt like we were on two different pages and I became disinterested, yadda yadda.
At any rate, later that night I began thinking about this stranger, whom I will most likely never see again, and then I started thinking about Scott.
Then I started to mentally revisit our last night together and how scary, shocking, and devastating it was.
^^ A coincidence that I recently tagged this
image in Pinterest? I don't think so. ^^
Then I began to sob.
And after the sobbing, I began an irrational, emotional conversation with Scott, interrupted intermittently with loud nose-blowing and convulsive gasping.
It was ridiculous.
And to top that off, I had to pause mid-breakdown to go in and soothe Ezra's distraught weeping upon waking from a nightmare.
He began crying about how much he missed Daddy and why did people have to die?
He is having a time with this all-day first grade business and has been quite emotional lately.
I think we all have.
Can you believe that it has been nearly eight months since our world turned upside-down?
That is, like, two-thirds of a year.
And I have, for the most part, become more stable, notwithstanding the twice-weekly hysterics;
And yet I am feeling like I am on the precipice of something different.
How is that for cryptic? And wordy?
Apparently I am full of brilliance tonight.
I cannot explain why I am feeling sad and better and despondent and hopeful all at the same time.
I also cannot explain my attraction to beards.
That is it for a Thursday evening.
Now I am going to dish up some ice cream and watch Safe Haven, while pretending that I am Jullianne Hough being seduced by Josh Duhamel.

1 comment:

  1. Super hot! Beards are the best. I am sorry things are hard.