Wednesday, April 30, 2014

It is spring! at least for today

^^ Watching "Daniel Tiger's Neighborhood" this morning in my favorite old man cardi. ^^
So the other night I walked into the kids' room to check on my sleeping babes only to find Ryan tucked into bed with her daddy's hoodie.
Now typically I sleep with it; you know, I turn down the bed, spread out the sweatshirt on "his" side with the hood on the pillow, like he's sleeping there.
Because I am a fruit cake.
I know it isn't him, although sometimes I drape my arm over the deflated sweatshirt the way I used to when he laid there.
I am doing it less and less.
I used to lay in the dark, squeezing that sweatshirt like my life depended on it, sniffing in the last wisps of his lingering cologne.
Now I just go in and get Micah and snuggle his teeny sleeping body instead.
And then, in his sleep, he turns over and casually lays his hand on my neck and I get a lump in my throat.
But that right there is a reason to be grateful, isn't it?
Anyway, as I was saying.
Ryan had the clothing all laid out and had positioned her body right in the middle with both arms of the garment wrapped around her.
Like a hug.
It makes me cry just typing it.
It is a funny thing, loving someone, and then losing them.
Right when it was getting good.
But I believe that he would want us to be happy.
Even though he can't participate.
And it is sunny today. Another reason to be happy.
It was genuinely spring yesterday here in Eugene.
The sun was shining.
There were pasty, white legs flashing themselves all over the darned place.
Today is supposed to be even better.
Which means I should probably go out and enjoy it.
Or go grocery shopping.
Did I mention I hate grocery shopping?
But I will speed shop and the go out into the bright day.
It makes me feel invigorated, like life is waiting to be seized, on days like this.
Yesterday I got so invigorated I painted the bedroom walls and ran 18,324 errands.
I get a spring in my step and feel like everything is going to be okay.
I can do this.
I can do this.

^^ Enraptured by PBS. I think I look slightly Asian sans makeup. Weird. ^^
^^ He's such a good sport. I make him do this all day. ^^


  1. Super cute old man cardi! That's so sweet and sad about Ryan. You are such a good mama. You need to come visit me in Boise sometime!

  2. Thinking of Ryan wrapping herself in her daddy's sweatshirt hug makes me cry too. What a sweet girl and a sweet idea.
    You go, girl...with that spring in your step! You really can do things...amazing things.
    Thank you, again for your inspiring words and your honesty. I love you!

  3. So I came across your blog from my sister-in-law Michelle. That one right there who just commented. :) And I have to tell you I am obsessed with your writing. I seriously check your blog every time I am on the computer to see what new enrapturing and witty things you have to tell us today. I feel like we were best friends in another life even though that totally sounds (and is) creepy, but the way you write and what you write about is amazing. You really are such an inspiration to all wives and women in general. I truly admire you.

    P.S. How in the world do you get such volume in your hair?? Mine is cut basically the exact way yours is but I can never seem to get it to look quite as great as yours does.

    Keep on keepin' on girl.

    1. Dry shampoo! Seriously. That and I don't wash my hair every day. Maybe three times a week. Sounds sick but it works :)

    2. I'll have to try dry shampoo sometime. I keep telling myself I'll try it some day and then get overwhelmed when I try to find a good brand. I don't wash mine every day either but I do get it wet in the shower after it being crunchy from sweaty workouts so then I have to blow dry it a little which I think makes it more dry and non-voluminious. Blah.

    3. I wet mine every day too. I also use Suave dry shampoo because it is awesome and smells the best. Plus it isn't too spendy. You should try it. You will have the highest hair around :)

  4. Reading what Ryan did with his sweater made me full out bust down crying. What a sweet lil lady and heartbreaking at the same time. I love that you are sharing this with us in such a real manner. You amaze and impress me with EVERY single post. Power to ya Momma bear! On another note, we lived in Eugene for a rotation and you have to visit Off the Waffle if you get the chance and enjoy a little piece of happiness for me if it's still around. yum! hugs**

    1. Yummy, I haven't tried that! Next time my sister and I go on a "date" we will have to go there! Thank you Tiffany.